Missing Our Normal
Updated: Jun 16, 2020
Written by: Heather Gibson, MA, LMFT
Adjusting to the numerous & rapid changes that the world has gone through over the last few months can be incredibly difficult. Have you found yourself feeling off, down, or anxious? That discomfort that you’ve been feeling, might actually be grief. Our mind can respond similarly when we lose someone to their passing, as when we lose other important parts of our identity. Loss of our jobs, our routine, sense of normalcy, contact with friends. All of these “secondary losses” can weigh just as heavily on the heart & mind, sending many of us into a depressed state. No doubt, the COVID pandemic and months- long quarantine has resulted in some form of loss for us all. It’s important to allow yourself the space & grace to grieve all of the losses you may have experienced recently.
Grief is an individualized experience. It can bring anger, denial, searching, and maybe one day, acceptance. We are wired for 'flight, fight, or freeze' when we are faced with a threat, difficult memory, or uncomfortable feeling. It makes sense then, that we would find ways to avoid feelings that cause us discomfort. “Catching” your emotion, labeling it, and sitting with it for a moment, (rather than automatically 'pushing it away') is actually one way to ease suffering. Each day, try identifying how you’re feeling. Maybe you wake up feeling off. Try writing down how you think you’re feeling: “I’m feeling sad today, irritated, tired”. Perhaps you could write a letter saying 'goodbye' to things that have changed, parts of your 'old life' that you miss. Letter writing can be a way to commemorate & honor our grief. These sort of 'check-in' exercises create a greater self-awareness, allow us to feel our emotions for a moment, and can help guide us along the journey of healing. Many of our therapists at Positive Change are trained to help individuals through grief & loss. To book an appointment, click the 'request an appointment' box to the right, or send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org
For more info on feelings of grief during COVID-19, check out the article: https://hbr.org/2020/03/that-discomfort-youre- feeling-is-grief